How do you be unstoppable, persistent, relentless and courageous?
Many people ask themselves this question.
Or should I say, they ask themselves: ‘why they AREN’T those things?’
But if you are looking to add those characteristics to your arsenal of tools, there’s a conversation we need to have.
Question: What do you do when you fall short? How do you think about yourself when you make mistakes or can’t seem to follow through?
With my coaching numbers in the triple figures, I can say with confidence that the vast majority of new entrepreneurs are VERY hard on themselves.
They are hard on themselves because they fall short of the RESULTS they were expecting. They feel that if they beat themselves up enough, it will spark a flame and trigger the energy to take action.
Sound familiar?
What are your thought patterns about yourself when you don’t make that
Do you live in regret, disappointment, anger or frustration?
Do you think the thoughts of not being good enough because there’s something wrong with you?
In here lies the problem.
You may want to read this sentence a few times: Feeling bad about yourself is part of the self-sabotaging cycle.
‘What’s that suppose to mean Tyson??’ Let me explain.
When you feel bad about yourself and your ‘poor results’, it’s close to impossible to take action with passion, persistence, and courage.
Therefore, your brain will always either make the decision to procrastinate, distract and resort to inaction or take action from fear, frustration, and desperation. This leads to more ‘poor results’ and the cycle begins!
How can you shift this??
Solution: Change the way you think of yourself even when you fall short of expectation.
What makes you feel disappointed is NOT the result. It’s what you think about yourself and what you make it mean when you do not reach that result. THAT IS THE KEY!
Are you judging yourself based on the results you are getting? Or is it based on the effort you exert on the journey?
How are you expected to get massive external results if you are new to the game? It’s very rare for someone to be a business success overnight, so if you judge yourself based on external results, you will be stuck in the emotional cycle that only leaves you trapped in the starting gate.
What can you do instead?
The answer is to love yourself no matter what happens!
What would happen if you were damn proud of your internal courage every step on the way regardless of what external result you achieved? What if you judged yourself not by some dollar figure or number of clients but by how YOU showed up every day with the intention of being better than you were yesterday? What if you expected many ups and downs but you were proud that each shortcoming was you learning outside your comfort zone?
That would be the start of a very different cycle.
I learned this on my journey when I feared judgment and criticism for my coaching content.
Daily thoughts of doubt were flooding my brain: ‘what if no one likes it?’ ‘What if no one reads it?’ ‘What if it’s not good enough to help people?’
However, I started using external goals of income and impact as the guideline direction of where I wanted to go, but I learned not to use it as a way to define myself.
I started seeing myself as a strong-minded coach who could grow through the ups and downs because I had a purpose and mission greater than myself. I’ve fallen flat on my face many times with some experiments, and I’m very proud of each one because the fall didn’t harm my smile.
I believe you also have the ability to rewrite the story you tell about yourself, to love and respect yourself with each step of the way.
If you don’t look after your own emotional well-being, you won’t have the resource call YOU to go out and achieve anyway. Recognise if you are new to the game, you are just doing the best you have
So ask yourself:
Why is it important that I love myself no matter what?
What can I be damn proud of on my journey no matter what happens?
What emotions will fuel me moving forward?
How can I view myself in a way that allows me to feel those feelings most often?
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